9 May

Diptopian Universe

Diptopian Universe

2ActPlay….. ………. By Hallie Hohbein …

Cast List

Rebels:
Harvey Jones……………………A student who is very excited to become a dystopian hero until he discovers it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.
Peter Melhark…………………………….A rebel who loves bread and want to lead.

Katherine Everknead…………..A strong headed rebel who also wants to lead.

Gail Thorn………………………A rebel who is always ready to encourage others.

Toby East……………………..A rebel who is afraid of nothing except his 4 fears.

Trisha Prime……………………………………….A rebel with a personality complex. Rose…………………………………………………………..A rebel disposable character

Fin…………………………………………………………..A rebel disposable character Wilbur…………………………………………………………..A rebel disposable character Annie…………………………………………………………..A rebel disposable character

Facility Workers:
Mr. Varns………………………..A male teacher in the Dippy facility who has his own ideas on how to run the facility.
Oxy Clean…………………………A female cleaner for the facility who loves her job and has a secret.

Regular/conforming Students:
Thomas…………..A student in Harvey’s class who listens to the government.

Theresa………….A student in Harvey’s class who listens to the government.

Ava……………………………………………………………A student disposable character. Sonya………………………………………………………..A student disposable character. Brenda………………………………………………………A student disposable character. Chuck………………………………………………………..A student disposable character. Winston…………………………………………………….A student disposable character. Newt………………………………………………………….A student disposable character.

Government Officials:
President Snoin…………President of the Dippy facility and a total neat freak. Jeanine……………………..A strong headed government official. Vice president

to President Snoin
Veronica……………A government official who is quiet and intelligent looking.

Vladimir…………………..A government official with lots of ideas that no one will listen to.

Roxie……………………………………….A government official who love brute force.

Guards
Guard 1………………………………………A well trained guard at the Dippy Facility Guard 2………………………………………A well trained guard at the Dippy Facility Guard 3………………………………………A well trained guard at the Dippy Facility Guard 4………………………………………A well trained guard at the Dippy Facility

SCENE 1

Scene: There is a school classroom. The only colors that are used are black, gray, and white. There are about 12 or so students, all wearing gray that are all looking straight ahead at a teacher standing at the front of the room who is lecturing. Everyone has both hands folded on their desks and are very still. There is a drawing on the board of a person giving a sheet of paper to another person who wasn’t really paying attention. Harvey is sitting in the back of the room tapping his finger on the side of his leg. He is sitting slightly away from everyone else.

Opening: As the curtain opens the teacher is lecturing loudly to a room full of students. He is talking about the laws of the land that they are forced to follow. Harvey is tapping the side of his leg rhythmically but silently. The focus is on Harvey with a spotlight but all the other lights are still up. All the other students are staring blankly ahead.

MR. VARNS
…Because of this, we have been made into the greatest unity of people ever in history. The times before this were terrible and people were allowed to do whatever they wanted, like buy eggs without the permission from the

government.
[students gasp and recoil a little bit. A few look away in disbelief] [HARVEY rolls his eyes a little bit]

THOMAS

[raises hand and is called on]
You mean people didn’t have their own food shopping advisor?

MR. VARNS
Not only that, but they went to shop for their own clothes and had… choice.

[Students gasp a little louder and mutter a little bit. They look away from the teacher. HARVEY looks with some excitement towards the front of the room.]

SILENCE!

[students quickly become silent and resume the position of hands on desk and face straight forward. Harvey resumes a bored face.]

!

3!

(MR. VARNS CONT.)

I know this is shocking news but that does not mean you can act like absolute hooligans! Now listen closely! The reason we have these laws is to control social order. The reason we have social order is because…

CLASS [HARVEY mumbles halfheartedly]

Without social order the Unity will fall and chaos will rule all. Dippy saved us. He will not betray us.

MR. VARNS
Good, now write a 1,000 word paper on why Dippy is the ultimate power

and why he is correct when he says choice is bad.

[at the same time, all the students reach for a pencil and paper, places them on their desk and begin to write. MR. VARNS goes and sits at his desk and looks at the students. Suddenly everyone freezes and HARVEY stands up in the back of the room. All the lights go dark and there is a single spotlight on Harvey. He turns to the audience and begins]

HARVEY
I hate all of this [gestures to the entire room] so much. No freedom, I can’t wear colored clothing, I never leave the confines of a building because of our complex system of tunnels and walkways that never require leaving. [sigh] There is nothing ever to do but write papers on Dippy and talk about

why choice is bad.
[HARVEY begins to cross the stage toward MR.VARNS’ desk.] I just want a chance
[looks up dramatically]

to live like the people
[puts hand in a fist and puts it straight up defiantly in front of body.] in dystopian novels from years ago.
[pauses, then continues]

!

4!

You see, I found this library full of ancient books in one of the old halls. I accidently fell on the handle while walking past and for some reason, it was open. I went in and there were so many books, so I read all sorts while I could like the Hunger Games, and Allegiant, and Uglies. Those people had such cool adventures. They got to find all these secrets and worked to overthrow their government with their friends. They all got to fall in love. It sounds like so much fun! But every time I try and rebel I just get thrown in solitary confinement and can’t eat for a few days. I’ve been doing it for, like, 3 months now and I haven’t even found another person to follow me to try and take a stand. They just all continue on like I’m not special, like I’m not trying to start a revolution or anything. And I’ve tried to get friends to help me in my revolution, I really have.

[walks over to THOMAS and pats his frozen body on the back.]

Like Thomas here. My bed pod is next to his bed pod and we once pondered the idea of skipping our nightly cleanse. [mumbled and trailing off] We never actually did it, because he didn’t want to get in trouble… [exclamation] BUT he was interested so I figured I’d ask him if he wanted to be my rebellion friend, but then all he did was report me and I got three days of special assimilation training which was awf-

[THOMAS suddenly jumps out of his frozen position and sits straight up looking straight forward. HARVEY looks at THOMAS, startled but tries to play it off.]

THOMAS
[chants] We love assimilation because it unifies the nation.

Don’t make a friend or it will spell your end.

[THOMAS resumes previous position. HARVEY looks at the audience again]

HARVEY
Creepy. But that’s how everyone is anymore. That’s about how Theresa [HARVEY walks over to THERESA and gestures to her] reacted when I talked to her about becoming my romantic interest. You see, I think I saw her smile once. It was at a picture of Dippy, but I’d never seen anyone smile

before so I asked if she wanted to fall in love so that we –

[THERESA suddenly jumps out of his frozen position and sits straight up looking straight forward. HARVEY looks at THERESA and is startled but makes an even more exaggerated effort to play it off.]

THERESA
We do not fall in love. We only care for Dippy above.

!

5!

[HARVEY looks slightly confused then unamused then resumes.]

HARVEY
Did you even hear that one? It’s so ridiculous. I believe in a thing called Love. I think Love has the power to save this broken world [HARVEY looks

very inspired]

[pause]

But then also did you hear that name in there again? Dippy? Gosh that’s such a lame name. Out of all the people how was Dippy the one to take charge and why did he insist on keeping his name? I mean at least in those books that I read the leaders have really menacing names that make them sound like a real force to be reckoned with. Dippy just sounds like that if I could punch him in the face and he would immediately cower and allow me to take over his facility. I mean, how did Dippy even get into power. He never–

[MR. VARNS pops up quickly and speaks very loudly. HARVEY is startled badly and doesn’t have time to play it off.]

MR. VARNS
[shouting] Dippy came into power when he proposed a bill to the American Congress that stated that he was to become dictator of America. The bill had nothing to do with religion, abortion, marriage, minority or women’s rights, or anything else remotely controversial. It appeased everyone. Every Congressman agreed that it was the most beautiful piece of legislation they had ever seen, so they passed they passed the bill on a unanimous vote. When the President read it he immediately decided that Dippy was the perfect man to run the country and resigned that same day. He then called Dippy to tell him he was to become dictator. Dippy took the position graciously and was soon conquering the whole world with nuclear weapons and secretly hidden, powerful government devices. Truly, Dippy

is the greatest ruler to ever live.

[MR. VARNS relaxes but does not go back into his frozen position. HARVEY looks back to the audience and speaks.]

HARVEY
Dippy couldn’t even leave a better legacy than that?

[while HARVEY is talking, MR. VARNS realizes that he is speaking and turns to him quickly, confused.]

MR. VARNS What in Dippy’s name is going on over there?!

!

6!

[HARVEY looks back at MR. VARNS very quickly and in shock. MR. VARNS stands up and walks briskly over to where HARVEY is standing. HARVEY begins to back away from him.]

HARVEY
[stammers] I’m just trying to monologue… to uh… sort out my thoughts uh

so I can… uh you know rally the people and– [HARVEY cuts out from fear] [MR. VARNS is standing right above HARVEY while he cowers]

MR. VARNS
Command 2,683: There shall be no monologuing at any time without direct

permission from Dippy himself.

HARVEY
But Dippy has been dead for hundreds of years, how am I—

MR. VARNS There will be no more of this nonsense.

[MR. VARNS pulls a colored candy and holds it up to HARVEY’S mouth] If rules you cannot keep, you will have to go to sleep.

[MR. VARNS grabs HARVEY’S mouth with one hand and shoves the candy in with the other. HARVEY struggles but is soon chewing the candy. Bliss spreads across HARVEY’S face as he slowly slides to the floor with his eyes closed. He passes out.]

[chanting rhythmically] We love assimilation because it unifies the nation. Don’t make a friend or it will spell your end.
We do not fall in love. We only care for Dippy above….

[Curtain falls slowly as he is saying this]

!

7!

SCENE 2
Scene: There is a meeting room. Very dull with average chairs and

one long meeting table. PRESIDENTS SNOIN is the only person in the room. She is dressed very formally in black, white, and gray. The room around them has minimal decoration with some gray flowers on the table and some papers at the head of the table for SNOIN. OXY is in the corner cleaning.

Opening: As the curtain opens SNOIN is moving around the room putting everything into place. She moves the chairs so they are perfectly lined up and places the flowers over and over again. She does this until the rest of the GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS walk in all holding large books. She then rushes to stand in front of her chair at the head of the table. OXY is cleaning.

SNOIN
Good morning to all of you. [GOV OFFICIALS all stand in front of their chairs, with JEANINE standing closest to the head of the table. They nod their heads at SNOIN when they enter.] Now let’s begin the Dippy chant. ‘D’. [puts her hand in a sign language D and puts it above the center of the circle]

JEANINE
‘I’. [does the same as SNOIN]

VERONICA
‘P’. [does the same as SNOIN]

ROXIE
‘P’. [does the same as SNOIN]

VLADIMIR
‘Y’[does the same as SNOIN]

[OFFICIALS all quickly pull back their hands to their heads, salute, then sit down]

SNOIN
Now let’s get down to business. Everyone here today should have come with an issue we need to deal with. Jeanine, you go first.

JEANINE
Thank you Snoin. It appears that the Library in hall 32 has been unlocked. Dippy commands that we do not allow anyone to read books but has left no instructions on how to dispose of them. Do we have any suggestions?

!

8!

VLADIMIR
[raises hand] We could just lock it again.

JEANINE
That’s stupid Vladimir. Any other suggestions.

VLADIMIR
We could put 2 locks on the door.

JEANINE
No, anyone else—

VLADIMIR [interrupts] 3 locks—

JEANINE
[interrupts] Anyone else!

ROXIE
Nuclear weapons are always an option…

JEANINE
No, they aren’t Roxie. [sigh] Okay, my idea is to burn the books.

SNOIN
Excellent idea Jeanine. I presume one of you will take care of it?

GOV OFFICIALS Affirmative.

SNOIN
Very good [writes something down on her papers] Next—

[GUARD 1 walks into the room and bows quickly]

GUARD 1
Teacher 1,024 would like to speak to you about an unruly student of his.

SNOIN
Send him in.

[GUARD 1 walks off stage and SNOIN quickly starts to straighten all her papers and gets out of her chair to fix everyone’s posture, including OXY’S. While she is doing this GUARD 1 comes back helping VARNS drag in the limp body of HARVEY. VARNS tries to stand up straight with his hand straight out in front of him with his hand in the shape of a sign language

!

9!

‘D’. VARNS and GUARD 1 stand quietly waiting to be addressed by SNOIN but SNOIN is back in her seat fixing her papers and the flowers, so JEANINE addresses them.]

JEANINE
Hello, I understand that you are having issues with an unruly student. I’m assuming that one.

[SNOIN looks satisfied with the arrangement and begins to pay attention]

VARNS
[soldier voice] Yes ma’am. Over the past few months this student has been disobeying the rules often. We have sent him to solitary confinement and to assimilation training multiple times, but they don’t seem to have any effect on him. Today I caught him monologuing.

[OFFICIALS all gasp.]

SNOIN
Yes, I see that is terrible… And what would you like us to do?

VARNS
[soldier voice] According to the Dippy Lawbook, rule 2,684, any student that is caught monologuing must be sent to Reform Camp.

[OFFICIALS all quickly flip through their books. JEANINE lands on the page first]

JEANINE
Right, rule 2,684… If you knew this why didn’t you just bring him straight there?

VARNS
[soldier voice] According to rule 310, I need official permission to bring him to the reform camp if the offence wasn’t in violation of rule 1, 3, 7, 12, or 92.

[SNOIN finds the page in her book and takes back the leadership role.]

SNOIN
I see. You have been given permission then. Dismissed

VARNS
[pause] Also, uh, I don’t know where the room is…

!

10!

SNOIN
Oh, sorry, [SNOIN rifles through the papers in her hand and pulls out one and studies it for a second] third door on the left in hall 3.

VARNS
[soldier voice] thank you ma’am!

[VARNS clumsily pushes all of HARVEY’S weight onto GUARD 1 then touches the sign-language ‘D’ to his forehead, explodes his hand in the air like a firework, then walks out with GUARD 1 pulling HARVEY with him.]

SNOIN
[to herself] we should probably check on those kids soon… [to the group] So to continue, Veronica, what would you like to bring before us today?

VERONICA
Yesterday our camera surveillance expert died. We need to put the new one in place right away.

SNOIN
Noted, and someone plans to take care of this?

GOV OFFICIALS Affirmative.

SNOIN
Excellent. I notice someone updated the system last week, so thank you for that… [rifles through her papers again. Everyone else looks around to see who takes credit for the replacement, but no one does, so they shrug and continue.]

SNOIN
Now it’s your turn Vladimir.

[VLADIMIR looks excited while everyone else roles their eyes.]

VLADIMIR
Alright guys. I’ve been informed that there has been an issue with water contamination in sector 4.

[While VLAMIMIR is saying this, the curtain begins to close.] Wait not yet, it’s my turn! Hey! Stop!
[curtains close]

!

11!

SCENE 3
Scene: We are now in the reform camp. There are also a number of

origami animals sitting in the middle of the circle. The room has very few things in it. There are a few desks and chairs pushed randomly out of the way. There are a few origami animals sitting randomly around the room. Everyone in the room also has a pile of origami figures. They are all wearing gray and black. A sign that says “Dippy Commands Reform!” hangs in the room.

Opening: Curtain opens. All the rebels but PETER are all sitting in a circle playing cards with pages from the Dippy Lawbook. PETER is sitting at a desk crumpling up some paper. Katherine is sitting next to Toby. Gail is sitting in the circle, but often looks over at Peter.

TOBY
Dippy Flush, I’ve got rules one through 10! Bring it in boys!

[KATHERINE looks shocked as everyone else throws down their cards and grumble. TOBY pulls all the origami figures to himself]

KATHERINE
[KATHERINE draws an arrow on TOBY] Toby you said you would let me win!

[Everyone in the circle rolls their eyes and gathers up the cards to give to TRISHA.]

TOBY
Katherine, stop pulling out your bow and arrow, this is not an appropriate time for that! I can’t help the fact that I’m better than you!

KATHERINE
[angry] Toby, if you weren’t so attractive, I swear, I would let this arrow straight through your head.

TOBY
[shrugs disinterested] Well, that’s not even one of my 4 fears so…

[KATHERINE kicks TOBY then puts down her bow and sits grumpily down on the floor.]

GAIL
[turning to PETER] Hey Peter do you want to join this next round?

!

12!

PETER
No it’s okay, look [holding out crumpled pieces of paper in his hand] I made some bread!

TRISHA
Peter, all you did was crumple up some paper…

GAIL
[to TRISHA] shhh [to PETER] it looks great Peter.

PETER
Thanks Gail! Do you want one? I’m about to make another one.

GAIL
Sure [PETER walks over to GAIL and gives her the paper bread. He then walks back to his desk, picks up more paper and starts to crumple it carefully. GAIL turns back into the circle] So, guys, can I bet this?

KATHERINE
I’d say that’s worth about Ɖ of an origami heart.

GAIL
What? So little?

KATHERINE
Hey, I’m being generous here.

GAIL
Fine. Trisha, go ahead and deal.

TRISHA
But why do I need to deal.

GAIL
Trisha, just do it.

TRISHA
Could you just tell me why? Otherwise I won’t know what choice to make.

GAIL
Stop doing that, it’s not a choice! It’s because we need to play the game! Oh just let me do it.

!

13!

[GAIL takes the cards from TRISHA and begins to deal. Suddenly the door is opened and HARVERY is thrown into the room. He crumples to the floor but he is waking up. Everyone is surprised. KATHERINE turns draws an arrow and points it at HARVEY. TOBY quickly pushes down the arrow.]

TOBY
Don’t shoot him Katherine, it looks like another rebel!

[REBELS look pleased as they all get up and run over to HARVEY and circle around him]

TOBY
Hey man are you any good at cards?

PETER
[to HARVEY] Never play a card game with him, he’s ruthless. I’m glad you could join us here though. [sticks out his hand to HARVERY] My name is Peter Melhark.

[suddenly HARVEY’s eyes snap open and he sits straight up and puts his fist in PETER’S hand (it’s the handshake of the future)]

HARVEY
Oh my gosh Peeta Melark! Hello, my name is Harvey! I can’t believe it’s really you Peeta, oh my goodness I’ve read all about you.

PETER
Uh, actually it’s Peter…

[HARVERY stands up quickly ignoring PETER. HARVERY walks up to GAIL and shakes her fist]

HARVERY
That must mean you are Katniss! This is crazy! I must be dreaming!

GAIL
No, my name is Gail.

[HARVEY looks very surprised at this response]

HARVEY
What? Gale you’re a girl!?

GAIL Excuse me!?

!

14!

[KATHERINE walks up to HARVEY hesitantly (they all clearly think he’s crazy)]

KATHERINE
Uh, hello there Harvey, are you okay? My name is Katherine and I… [HARVEY cuts Katherine off]

HARVEY
Oh you’re Katniss? Oh course you are, I should have guessed, look at that bow and arrow.

KATHERINE
No, it’s Katherine. What are you even talking about?

HARVEY
Why I’m only having the best dream of my entire life! I’m inside my favorite book! So where is the Capital? I’m ready to beat President Snow [starts throwing fake punches] I’m ready to beat down that government once and for all! Oh I never want to wake up from this!

PETER
[grabs HARVEY to keep him still] Harvey, this isn’t a dream! You are in the Reform Camp in the Dippy Facility.

TRISHA
Maybe he hit his head after they knocked him out.

HARVEY
Knocked me out? Reform Camp? So I’m not asleep?

PETER
No, you’re not.

HARVEY
You mean [horrified] Even after all these months I still haven’t had a dream about fighting in a dystopian novel. I’ve been trying that lucid dreaming thing for months. I’ll just have to try again tonight.

TRISHA
Well good luck sleeping on this hard floor.

HARVEY
[to TRISHA and TOBY] Well, now that I know where I am, I better ask what your names are.

!

15!

TOBY I’m Toby.

TRISHA
[to the distance] Sometimes I don’t even know who I am.

TOBY
That’s Trisha. She has a bit of an identity crisis.

HARVEY
Trisha, Toby… Tris, Tobias… are you guys sure I’m not dreaming.

TRISHA
[looking into the distance] It’s so hard to tell anymore…

KATHERINE
[to HARVEY] You definitely aren’t dreaming.

HARVEY
But you guys would still consider yourselves rebels though right? You still want to overthrow the government and all that?

PETER
Of course!

HARVEY
And you all hate that everything seems to be gray or black?

GAIL
It’s so depressing!

HARVEY
You all want to become individuals?

KATHERINE
I want the world to find its individuality.

HARVEY
So you guys still follow the tropes! Oh I want to be apart of this. Let me in on your revolution plan. I can fight and I’ve done all my research, so I know the best ways to beat them. Oh have you started a love triangle yet? Those work awesome for revolutions. With 2 people in love with the same person there is more drive for both of them to work harder in the revolution to impress the one they love. Then the loved one has to search their heart to see who they truly love and will develop more as a character as a result.

!

16!

[awkward silence as everyone stares at HARVEY]

KATHERINE
[slowly shaking head] No, I don’t think we have that going on

GAIL
I don’t think I need to share my love… [looks to PETER. PETER is clueless].

PETER
Don’t worry about it Gail, we can smooth all the details out later. For now, let’s just welcome Harvey on board [puts arm around HARVEY] How would you feel about being my right hand man.

GAIL
Woah wait, I thought I was going to be your right hand man.

KATHERINE
Forget about right hand man, I’m supposed to be the leader of this revolution.

TOBY
You lead our last revolt though Katherine.

KATHERINE
And it went super well!

TOBY
All we did was follow after you screaming while you shot arrows at the food servers until they gave us cake. I’m for Peter taking this one.

PETER
I really enjoyed that cake though. I just wish I had some frosting to decorate with… But I think we should all support Toby. Me for leader, what do we say?

[GAIL shoots up her hand, followed quickly by HARVEY. TRISHA looks worried, but TOBY holds up both of their hands and everyone else but KATHERINE raise their hand. KATHERINE then raises her hand reluctantly].

PETER
Then it’s decided! Don’t worry guys, I’ve got a great plan.

[during PETER’S speech VARNS walks in and is just about to announce himself when he sees them all huddled so he quickly hides behind a desk and listens.]

!

17!

PETER CONT’
My thought was that we would start by trying to rally any other support we can find then try to find weapons. After this we can find the room where the government officials meet and attack them head on. We can then demand that they give the control over to us so that we can rule over the facility.

TRISHA
So where are these weapons?

PETER
Well I figured we could just find some…

TRISHA
Because I have this map with a cave under to the facility that should have some weapons.

HARVEY
[surprised to TRISHA] From how you were acting I didn’t think you were going to be important.

TRISHA
Maybe you’re right. I’ll have to make a decision someday…

PETER
Don’t worry, she’s too crazy to be important. [pushes TRISHA out of the way and grabs her map] I happen to know that there is a cave close to here that we can get weapons from.

GAIL
Great idea Peter! So how do we get out of the facility?

TOBY
But leaving the facility is one of my four fears!

GAIL
I don’t care Toby.

ROSE
There are exits in some of the bed chambers…

PETER
There are exits in the bed chambers. So what are we waiting for, let’s go!

!

18!

HARVEY
Alright! Let’s go! [[HARVEY begins to run for the front door towards where VARNS is hiding. VARNS looks nervous and tries to make himself smaller]

PETER
Actually, there is an exit here in the back that we use a lot.

HARVEY
Right.
[HARVEY runs in the other direction. VARNS calms down]

[PETER leads the way, and all the rebels followed him. After they all leave VARNS comes out of his hiding spot]

VARNS
Very interesting…

[VARNS runs off the opposite end of the stage]

!

19!

SCENE 4
Scene: Varns is running into a hallway. It has hardly anything in it at

all except Oxy who is cleaning the floors with a broom.

Opening: This will be set in front of the curtains. Oxy will casually be sweeping the floors when suddenly Varns walks quickly onto the stage. He sees Oxy and suddenly slows down and slowly in a bad attempt to look casual slides up next to Oxy.

VARNS
[out of the side of his mouth] Hey

OXY
[very startled] ah, hello, what are you doing, you aren’t supposed to talk in the hallway.

VARNS
Shhh don’t worry, I’m being discrete. Your name is Oxy right? I saw you in the government meeting room cleaning. I need to talk to you about something that’s important. [Offers Oxy his hand]

OXY
[looks around. Puts her fist in VARNS’] Oxy Clean. I can talk, but only for a little bit. I can’t get behind on my cleaning schedule.

VARNS
You’re going to have to forget about your cleaning schedule for today.

OXY
[surprised] What? I can’t possibly do that! Rule 1,046 absolutely forbids any schedule change. Our world could collapse if I don’t–

VARNS
[cuts off OXY] SHHH it’s okay, this is for the sake of the entire facility and for Dippy above. You see, I just heard today that there is a group of teenagers that plans on overthrowing the government.

OXY
What? There is no way that a random group of teenagers will be able to overthrow a powerful government.

VARNS
Of course not, that’s a ridiculous plot line. Our government may not be strong enough to fight them though. Remember the meeting from earlier today? When I told them I needed to put the student in a reform camp they had to look through the Dippy Lawbook to confirm it.

!

20!

OXY
That is true. How could they not memorize all 5,000 rules that Dippy has set in place for us to in order to live in a perfect society. They are the most perfect and important works of literature that the world has to offer.

VARNS
I know, it’s terrible, which is why I agree that our current government should be overthrown, but I also don’t think that a group of teenagers will be any better at it. After all, I don’t think any of them know even half of the Dippy Lawbook. Without social order the Unity will fall and chaos will rule all. They are not heeding Dippy’s warning, but I know that you know and follow all of Dippy’s commands. You could be a great ruler for Dippy.

OXY
[realization] Maybe I could be a great ruler…

VARNS
That’s right! So let’s get going so we can stop those rebels from overthrowing the government so we can do it properly!

[VARNS begins to run off but OXY grabs his arm]

OXY
Wait, you can’t just expect me to go along with your plan. I still have a schedule to keep and Dippy doesn’t have a command on how to deal with a bad government. You can’t just expect me to join your cause. Plus it’s nearly lights out…

[VARNS thinks for a second]

VARNS
[a little reluctantly] I could do all your cleaning for you.

OXY
Actually, I quite like cleaning.

VARNS
[more enthusiastic] I could give you my cleaning duties!

OXY
Nah, that sounds like too much cleaning. I like the amount that I do now.

VARNS
[thinks for a little while longer before very reluctantly speaking] I could give you my brownie on special brownie day.

!

21!

OXY
I couldn’t possibly…

[OXY makes a look like he is about to refuse and VARNS starts to look relieved. OXY then stops himself, thinks about it for a few seconds longer, then looks more agreeable]

Will you give me the full brownie?

VARNS Well…

OXY
I won’t join unless it’s the full brownie.

VARNS
[hesitates] Oh alright, the full brownie, but we’ve got to go now.

OXY
No problem. Let’s go!

[VARNS puts on a disguise then OXY and VARNS run off the stage]

!

22!

SCENE 5
Scene: In the sleeping chambers. There are a number of very uniform

looking beds with the CONFORMING STUDENTS lay very still all with their arms crossed over their chests and their hands in the shape of sign language ‘Ds’. They are all dressed in black, gray, and white pajamas.

Opening: As the curtains open the CONFORMING STUDENTS are still laying in their beds as the REBELS come running in led by PETER.

PETER
[to REBELS] Okay so the exit should be in the back somewhere.

HARVEY
Hey guys, these are all my classmates. We should wake them up to see if they want to join the revolution.

KATHERINE
Actually, that’s a pretty good idea Harvey. You’re more of a leader than I thought you’d be. [looks HARVEY up and down] Maybe you need to tell me more about that love triangle.

HARVEY
[sheepishly] Well, I didn’t really have myself in mind for the love triangle, but I’m always willing to help progress the storyline—

KATHERINE
[loudly] Hey wake up everybody! We’ve got a revolution going on here!

[STUDENTS slowly get out of bed]

HARVEY
[to REBELS] Oh this is so exciting. This is like a rally. We’re gonna start an army and we might even have a love triangle going on.

THERESA
We do not fall in love. We only care for Dippy above.

[STUDENTS are all up and standing in front of their bedpods uniformly.]

HARVEY
Well you’re gonna change your mind after this. [to REBELS] Who has a speech prepared?

!

23!

TOBY
[steps back] Not me. Public speaking is one of my four fears.

HARVEY
Okay… How about you Peter?

PETER
Well, I didn’t expect to have to talk in front of people. I’ll try.

[PETER turns to the students with a large smile on his face, looking quite charming.]

Hello everyone, looking great today. I see we’ve got those nice gray pajamas on. Are those new?

THERESA
[straight face] Actually, I just got these the other day. They come with matching underwear. I know the consistency would make Dippy happy.

PETER
[cough] Ah, I see… Well I was just wondering if you wanted to join our revolution…

KATHERINE
Hey that’s not the way you should be asking them. This calls for a speech not a get to know you session. [steps in front of PETER] We came here today to recruit you for our revolution! With our stellar plan we will rise up against the government and take them down! Take down the Patriarchy!

[Everyone waits for more, but KATHERINE stays frozen in a triumphant postion.]

HARVEY
So what do you say? Of course you’re gonna join us, that’s a worthy cause…

THOMAS
Actually, I like here. I don’t really want to follow you.

HARVEY
[looks confused] huh?

THERESA
I agree actually. It’s not that bad. We have 3 meals a day, we get time to sleep and we always get all of our homework done in class so we have plenty of time to take our daily cleanse and I don’t even have to wash my own clothes. There’s always someone around to take care of stuff for me.

!

24!

[STUDENTS nod their heads in agreement]

HARVEY
But you are young and oppressed in a world without happiness…

THOMAS
Happiness isn’t that great. You can’t be happy all the time, so when you aren’t happy you have the chance to be sad. I’d rather be forever content. HARVEY
But you have to have opinions on what should be different around here…

THERESA
Nah, opinions are too hard.

[STUDENTS nod heartily in agreement]

STUDENTS
We love assimilation because it unifies the nation.

HARVEY
[helplessly] But the revolution… We can do it guys…

THOMAS
And really, do you think a group of teenagers is really going to make a difference?

HARVEY
But people do it in books…

TOBY
Hey Harvey, don’t worry about it. We’ve got plenty of people already, we don’t need these stiffs.

HARVEY
But if they’re fine with this, then does that mean everyone else is fine? But who could be okay with an oppressive society like this?

SONYA
Just because you want a revolution doesn’t mean that everyone else wants one. I could give you some pointers though. My mom is President Snoin.

HARVEY
What no way! How are you not a more important character!

!

25!

SONYA
Who says I’m not important? Anyway, she’s a real neat freak, so the best way to get at her is to just make a mess. She can’t stand it.

HARVEY
Really? That’s it?

SONYA That’s it.

PETER
Well come on, we can’t make a mess if we don’t have those weapons.

HARVEY
We don’t have to have weapons to make a mess.

PETER
With our kind of mess you will. Plus, every strong leader needs a weapon they specialize in.

KATHERINE I’ve got my bow!

HARVEY
How did you even get that…

TOBY
I’m super awesome with knives. Not to brag.

TRISHA
I use guns well…

PETER
And I can lift super heavy stuff! [everyone stares] Like really heavy stuff. [still staring] I can throw it too…

KATHERINE
[pats PETER on the back] That’s very nice Peter. Anyway, we’ll find your specialty weapon, we just have to get there.

HARVEY
[a little reluctantly] Okay, I guess most heroes have some sort of weapon. I’ll come with.

KATHERINE
Yay Harvey! [grabs HARVEY’S arm] Let’s go then!

!

26!

[KATHERINE begins to run toward the wall dragging HARVEY but slowly stops before she reaches the wall and looks around]

Uh, where’s the exit? I thought it was supposed to be in the back of the room.

THOMAS
It’s back there behind Harvey’s old bedpod

[KATHERINE drags HARVEY over to the wall and they examine it together]

HARVEY
You mean I’ve been that close to freedom this whole time!? How did I never see this before.

THOMAS
Maybe it’s because you secretly like it here.

HARVEY
That’s ridiculous! I don’t want to live under this tyranny any longer. I’m going to take those corrupt officials out of power!

THERESA
Maybe it’s because this isn’t the kind of freedom you really want Harvey. Maybe all you really want is a revolution and to cause trouble like the people in your silly little books. Maybe the idea of freedom is more enticing than your actual freedom.

HARVEY
[looks shocked and thoughtful] Well… I don’t think that’s…

KATHERINE
Oh don’t listen to those guys, they’re crazy. I mean, why else would they not want to join us. Anyway, [pulls out bow and arrow] let’s go!

[All the REBELS run off in front of HARVEY hooping and hollering. HARVEY looks back at the REBELS, then at the STUDENTS, then toward the REBELS, sets a determined face, and chases after them. STUDENTS walk back to their beds and lay down as they were before. VARNS and OXY run quickly on the stage look around for a second then silently follow the rebels.]

!

27!

SCENE 6
Scene: The REBELS and HARVEY are running through the tunnel,

which is in front of the stage.

Opening: REBELS are running out from one side of the FRONT of the stage to the other lead by PETER. HARVEY exits a little after the REBELS and chases them down. This scene can be adlibbed as much as is necessary for the scene to be changed.

[REBELS are all hooping and hollering when HARVEY catches up with them.]

HARVEY
Hey guys! Wait! Stop running!

[REBELS stop running and turn to HARVEY]

PETER
What’s up Harvey. Do you need something? I’ve got some extra bread in my pocket…

HARVEY
No, I’m fine it’s just, does anyone know where we are going?

PETER
The cave of course!

HARVEY
But where is the cave?

PETER
Oh, uh… Trisha?

TRISHA
I can read the map. Just follow me.

KATHERINE, PETER, TOBY NO!

[TRISHA looks surprised]

PETER
I want to lead this group.

[PETER walks over and looks at the map, but confused how to read it]

!

28!

KATHERINE
Excuse me, but I am going to lead.

[KATHERINE walks over and looks at the map, but also confused on how to read it]

TOBY
Actually, I need to lead.

[TOBY also looks at the map, but again looks confused]

KATHERINE
I thought walking outside the facility is one of your four fears?

TOBY
Not being able to lead outside the facility is another one of my four fears.

HARVEY
[to himself] That’s an oddly specific fourth fear…

[PETER, TOBY, and KATHERINE look away from the map and glare at each other.]

TRISHA
Since you all obviously can’t read a map, how about I just tell all of you how to get there and you can all lead together.

PETER, TOBY, KATHERINE [begrudgingly] Okay, fine.

[PETER, TOBY and KATHERINE crowd around TRISHA as she uses her hands to describe how to get to the cave. GAIL pulls HARVEY off to the side. The remaining REBELS stand around aimlessly, unsure of what to do.]

GAIL
[looking a little embarrassed] Harvey, I’ve got to tell you something.

HARVEY Yes?

GAIL
Well, the truth is after seeing you try and stand up for your beliefs back there with your old classmates. You sounded so strong and important and I realized that I… [pause] I really love main characters. They’re the best.

!

29!

HARVEY
Huh? But I thought you loved Peter?

GAIL
I used to, but I know now that you are far more important. I’ve decided to join your love triangle. Katherine already joined right? I’ll complete the triangle!

HARVEY
Really? No way, this is awesome, I didn’t think I’d have the chance to be in the love triangle. This is great!

[PETER, TOBY, KATHERINE, TRISHA break their circle.]

KATHERINE
Okay everyone, we know where we’re going now. Let’s head out!

HARVEY
I have great news Katherine! Gail has decided to love me too, so now we have a complete love triangle. Let the character growth begin!

KATHERINE
What!? Hey I don’t want to share you. [walks over to GAIL and pushes her a bit] I’m not gonna share, so I guess we’re going to have fight it out. [pulls out bow]

GAIL
Fine, I can take you. I’m stronger than I look.

HARVEY
Woah woah woah ladies, no need to fight…

KATHERINE and GAIL Shut up.

[TOBY runs over and steps between GAIL and KATHERINE]

TOBY
Hey, we seriously need to get going. You can figure this out later.

PETER
That’s right. I’ll lead the way!

KATHERINE
No way, that’s my job!

!

30!

TOBY
Wait, me too!

[KATHERINE and PETER race off the stage followed by TOBY.]

HARVEY
Well, I guess we follow.

[HARVEY and the remaining rebels follow. After they leave VARNS and OXY walk on and follow them.]

!

31!

SCENE 7
Scene: It’s a forest. The stage has trees and bushes scattered around.

In front of the stage there are some stones which marks the area of the secret cave. The cave has a few weapons, including some arrows, some knives, a few guns, a sword, a trident, a mace, and bags of flour next to the mace.

Opening: As the curtain opens, REBELS and HARVEY run onto the stage lead by PETER, TOBY, and KATHERINE.

[PETER, TOBY, and KATHERINE are arguing over the location of the cave.]

KATHERINE
We were supposed to turn left back there!

PETER
No, I’m telling you it’s right here. We just need to look around a bit. Everyone, spread out and start searching.

KATHERINE
I want at least one person to go back and make sure that we weren’t supposed to take a left.

WILBUR
As you wish.

HARVEY
[confused] I don’t think that line fits this genre…

[REBELS all look around the area. WILBUR walks over to the area they came from. TRISHA walks to the front of the stage and finds a gun.]

TRISHA
Hey, we must be close because I just found a gun!

[everyone looks at TRISHA, but before they can respond WILBUR comes running back on the stage]

WILBUR
[shouting] Hey, there were some people following us—

[TRISHA turns around and shoots WILBUR in the head. WLIBUR drops and dies]

HARVEY
What the heck was that about Trisha!?

!

32!

TRISHA
He sounded crazy while he was running back. He might have been a threat.

HARVEY
He wasn’t a threat! Even if he was, you could have shot him in the leg or something to stop him. Why would you shoot him in the head!?

PETER
Woah, Harvey, calm down, he wasn’t even that important. We never even told you his name.

HARVEY
What was his name?

PETER Wilbur.

HARVEY
Oh, I guess that’s why Trisha shot him in the head… But what was he saying? People following us?

VARNS
[offstage] Hello. We are about to enter. Please don’t shoot. We are here to join the revolution.

HARVEY
Trisha put the gun away!

[TRISHA puts the gun down] Okay, come on in.

[VARNS in disguise and OXY walk in slowly with their hands up. KATHERINE pulls an arrow on them.]

KATHERINE
State your name and purpose!

HARVEY
Katherine calm down they want to join us. [to VARNS and OXY] you guys can relax. Can you tell me your names?

VARNS
Oh I’m, uh… [looks at audience] Snarv, [back to HARVEY] yeah Snarv.

!

33!

[REBELS look at VARNS very confused]

OXY
[happily] And I’m Oxy Clean! We’re here to overthrow the government!

[VARNS gives OXY a ‘what did you just say?’ look. The REBELS look suspicious for a few seconds then suddenly they all smile. VARNS looks relieved while everyone else shakes OXY’S hand. OXY smiles widely at all of them.]

PETER
Wow you’re smiling. You have to be rebels.

[REBELS all agree]

VARNS
So what can we do to help?

PETER
Well right now we are looking for a cave that is supposed to have a bunch of weapons. You can help us look for that.

OXY
You got it!

[GAIL looks off stage as if she is looking into a deep hole]

GAIL
Hey there’s a huge hole over here. Do you think that helps us?

TOBY
I bet the weapons are down there. There’s a net at the bottom, I know it. Everything that’s good is at the bottom of a high jump.

[PETER looks down the hole nervously]

PETER
Alright then, do you wanna jump first.

TOBY
No way! Heights are one of my four fears!

HARVEY
[confused] I thought you already listed four fears…

!

34!

TRISHA
I’ll jump. I think I finally figured out the role I was meant to play to become a major character. My purpose in life is to jump first and lead the way.

[Everyone quickly moves out of the way to let TRISHA through. OXY is still looking around for the save. TRISHA stands by the side of the stage then jumps out of sight. Everyone but OXY watches her for a little bit. OXY walks to the front of the stage and sees the entrance to the actual cave.]

OXY
Hey guys, I think this is the entrance to the cave.

[everyone looks over quickly to OXY, then to the hole, then back to OXY. HARVEY looks horrified but everyone else just shrugs]

PETER
Well at least she wasn’t an important character.

HARVEY
What do you mean not important!? She’s still a person! She got us to this cave!

PETER
Well then her usefulness is over. Anyway, she volunteered to jump. It’s for the sake of the revolution Harvey, there must be sacrifices.

HARVEY
But that’s 2 people now!

PETER
[to TOBY] 2?

[TOBY shrugs]

KATHERINE
Oh, he’s talking about the one that was shot.

PETER
Oh okay. [to HARVEY] necessary sacrifice.

KATHERINE
Come on, let’s just go to the cave. I hope they have more arrows I can use!

TOBY
I want a machete!

!

35!

PETER
I want stuff to throw!

[GAIL grabs HARVEY’S arm]
GAIL
Come on Harvey, we can find a weapon for you.

[KATHERINE glares at GAIL, but they all walk into the cave (downstage).]

VARNS Woah.

KATHERINE
[runs to the bow and arrow] Hey look arrows!

TOBY
[runs to the knives] Knives!

PETER
[looks at the mace] Check it out! [runs to the bags of flour] Bags of flour to throw!

[PETER excitedly picks up a bag of flour. GAIL walks over and picks up the mace with some effort]

GAIL
Peter, I think that this might work a little better as a weapon [hands mace to PETER]

PETER
But the flour—

GAIL
I really think you should use this.

PETER
[sets the bag of flour down disappointed] I guess I can work with this…

GAIL
What are you thinking about Harvey?

KATHERINE
I would suggest a bow and arrow. Then we can be matching! [wink]

HARVEY
That looks a little hard to master. Maybe I’ll try… a sword!

!

36!

[HARVEY picks up the sword but GAIL quickly pulls it out of his hand and puts a gun in it’s place.]

GAIL
I think a gun will be easiest for you. Major characters always have good luck with a gun.

HARVEY
Oh, I guess that makes sense…

[everyone else grabs a weapon (FIN grabs the trident) except OXY]

PETER
[to OXY] Don’t you want one? I bet you could use a sword.

OXY
No, it’s okay, I’m not much of a fighter.

PETER
[shrug] suit yourself. Alright everyone, before we head back we should probably tell Snarv and Oxy of our plan. So—

VARNS
[interrupting] Actually, I have my own plan I want some help with.

PETER
But I’ve already—

KATHERINE
Oh come on Peter, we both know your plan is stupid. What have you got for us Snarv?

VARNS
Well, we’re wasting time right now, so I’ll tell you on our way back.

KATHERINE
Sounds like a better plan already! Let’s head back then!

PETER
I’ll at least lead the way back… uh who remembers how to get back?

[everyone looks around]

OXY I do!

!

37!

PETER
[relieved] good, so all you need to do is tell me where to go—

OXY
Follow me everyone!

[OXY runs out the cave and off stage. PETER looks a little upset, but follows everyone who are running after OXY.]

!

38!

SCENE 8
Scene: It’s set in the government office. GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS

are sitting around the table. Same minimalist décor with gray flowers. Everyone is wearing gray.

Opening: As the curtain opens, REBELS, HARVEY, and OXY run onto the stage lead by PETER. They are all breathing heavily except KATHERINE who has her bow drawn. HARVEY puts his hand out to stop everyone. The GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS look up in shock.

PETER
[still breathing heavily] Hey! We’re here to overthrow you!

[GOVERNMENT gasp]

PETER
[still recovering] That’s right, say your goodbyes to your oppressive reign because you won’t have it much longer. Alright Snarv, now tell us your plan. You forgot to tell me it on our way here… [PETER and everyone else look around but Varns is nowhere to be seen] What? Where did he go? Oxy? [OXY shrugs]

[GOVERNMENT regain their confidence]

SNOIN
Well, well, well it seems that our little revolutionaries have lost their leader and their will to fight.

HARVEY
Hey that’s not true! We are all strong individuals. Come on guys, let’s attack!

KATHERINE
[serious] I will attack but only under one condition… Harvey, you have to stop seeing Gail. You can only love me.

GAIL
Excuse me!? You do not get to decide that for him. Harvey loves me more anyway and would never leave me for you, crazy bow girl!

KATHERINE
Ha, you call that an insult? Well you are the most boring character, including those students from the bed chamber. You’re only here for the sake of romantic interest.

!

39!

GAIL
Well at least I don’t try to shoot everything that moves! [to HARVEY] did you ever hear? She’s an arsonist. They call her the girl on fire—

KATHERINE
Don’t bad mouth me to Harvey! [to HARVEY] Just tell her that you love me and not her, Harvey.

HARVEY
I really don’t know either of you well enough to say which one I love more…

KATHERINE
Well then I’m not gonna fight until you tell me.

GAIL
I’m not either.

[KATHERINE and GAIL walk away very annoyed.]

HARVEY
Come on, that’s not important here. We need to fight! Now who wants to fight!?

ROSE
I volunteer as tribute!

GUARDS
You shall not pass!

HARVEY
Only one of those references was right!

[ROSE runs toward the OFFICIALS when suddenly the GUARDS start pouring in from the other side of the stage. They shoot ROSE and she dies]

HARVEY
Oh no not… [doesn’t know her name]

PETER
[to HARVEY] Rose.

HARVEY
Not Rose! I’ll avenge your death

[HARVEY takes aim and shoots, but the GUARDS look around confused before realizing he didn’t hit any of them]

!

40!

HARVEY
How could I miss? The rebel always hits the bad guy!

FIN
Don’t worry I’ve got this!

[FIN pulls out a trident and runs through the GUARDS taking out quite a few of them before one finally shoots him and he dies]

PETER
Nice job Fin, you looked good out there. I like this attacking one at a time style. Now go join him Annie!

[ANNIE runs out and immediately gets shot.]

PETER
Oh, she wasn’t quite as good. Go Toby!

TOBY
Are you trying to imply something about my character importance? Besides, charging by myself is one of my four fears.

HARVEY
[confused] Another fear?

PETER
[ignores HARVEY] Okay fine, Gail?

GAIL
I’m not fighting until Harvey says he loves me.

KATHERINE
Which will never happen because he loves me!

[there is all sorts of fighting when JEANINE goes up to PETER and after easily deflecting his mace she grabs him like a human shield]

JEANINE
You need to stop this ridiculous revolution right now or I will kill him right in front of you all.

[the REBELS stop fighting immediately and look at JEANINE]

Very good attention. Now, I think we all know we can easily out power you. Did you really think that a random group of poorly trained teenagers could

!

41!

overpower even a small group of guards, let alone take over the entire facility? That’s obviously not possible.

SNOIN
Jeanine is right. We are your government and you must respect us.

JEANINE
So in order to engrave this idea into your mind, we are going to execute your friend as an example for you guys.

SNOIN
Oh I hope that won’t make a mess…

HARVEY
But we stopped fighting. I’ll comply with whatever, I promise, just spare him his life. This wasn’t how any of the books turned out!

JEANINE
Just goes to show you how toxic books can be for the mind and for society. We really do need to shut down that Library once and for all so that something ridiculous like this will never happen again. It’s too late to plead now. It’s about time you learn that not everything will always go your way in life like it does in books. Guards take them back down to the reform camp.

[All the REBELS kiss their 3 middle fingers and put them up in the air. And whistle the 4 notes. The guards drag them off stage.]

SNOIN
Alright, I want one of you to go check the video footage to see how they got in here. Which one of you instated a replacement?

[OFFICIALS look around at each other waiting for a reply]

SNOIN
Wait, did none of you do it?

ROXIE
I didn’t do it, but I saw someone in the room. I figured someone else did it.

SNOIN
So if none of you did it then who did do it?

[OFFICIALS shrug]

!

42!

Well, then never mind it, we can figure that out later. For now… [to PETER] what should we do with you?

PETER
You can do whatever you want with me, I’m not afraid!… [PETER hesitates] except knives. Please don’t use knives, they really freak me out.

JEANINE
We’ll do whatever we want. I’m for public execution.

VERONICA
I am for the hanging.

ROXIE
Oh hanging is so medieval. I think that we should go with death by lasers. Pew pew.

VLADAMIR
That all sounds a little violent to me. We could just poison him quietly in a room.

GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS Shut up Vlad!

SNOIN
How about we just decide it later.

JEANINE
But isn’t this kind of urgent?

SNOIN
Is anything really ever urgent besides cleaning?

JEANINE Of course!

[GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS fight verbally. PETER slowly scoots away.]

ROXIE
Hey! The boy is trying to run away!

[PETER quickly scurries off the stage as ROXIE runs after him]

JEANINE
Hey how are we supposed to execute you if you run away!

!

43!

[JEANINE also runs off the stage. The remaining people shrug, then also chase them off the stage. Right after they leave, VARNS comes in from the other side. He stands in the center of the stage thoughtfully for a few moments then begins his walk off the stage.]

VARNS
[evil laugh] HAHAHA.

[Curtains close.] End ACT I

!

44!

ACT TWO

SCENE 1
Scene: Back in the reform camp. All the origami figures are gone, the

chairs and desks are set up orderly. The REBELS, HARVEY, and OXY are all in there. GUARD 2 and GUARD 3 are standing by the door.

Opening: As the curtain opens. The REBELS are all walking around looking very sad and defeated. OXY is sitting happily in a corner. HARVEY is pacing back and forth at the front of the stage very quickly, deep in thought. TOBY is walking through the empty desks.

TOBY
There sure are a lot of empty chairs and empty tables.

HARVEY
[while still pacing] Wrong genre.

[REBELS sigh]

GAIL
Harvey, there’s no point in trying anymore just sit down—

HARVEY
[suddenly stops pacing] Guys I got it! We can sneak out through the air vents and find the room where they are keeping Peter. Then, before they suspect we are there, we all attack at once. We won’t go in one at a time like last time, so they can’t overwhelm us.

KATHERINE
That’s an even worse plan from before. Plus they took away my bow!

TOBY
There aren’t even any air vents in this room.

HARVEY
Then we can dig out!

KATHERINE
This floor is solid concrete!

GUARD 2
Hey! [REBELS look to the GUARDS] We can hear everything you’re saying. We’re not letting any punk kids get past us.

!

45!

GUARD 3
Yeah, there’s no way you can beat our years of Dippy military training just because you have a little bit of heart and a few weapons you can’t even use properly.

[All the REBELS look down in despair. Everyone freezes as HARVEY walks to the front of the stage]

HARVEY
This isn’t what I wanted at all. When I found out that there were actual rebels in my dystopian world, I thought it was a dream come true. I was sure that we were going to destroy the corrupt and evil government and take over so that we could set out a better life for everyone. When they seemed to act so much like the characters from dystopian books I was even more sure that we would be able to win, but when it came down to it, they couldn’t even stand to fight. The ones that did got killed right away and [suddenly angry] I couldn’t even hit any of the guards with my gun! Major characters are always good with guns! [sigh and calms down again] Maybe Theresa was right. I only wanted what was in the books and didn’t actually want a revolution. All I did was hope it would work. I finally made some friends, but not even the bond of friendship could let us win.

GUARD 2
[calmly] Don’t make a friend or it will spell your end.

HARVEY
I suppose Dippy was right… Even love didn’t work out for me. When I finally got the love triangle I had wanted so badly all it did was hurt our revolution.

GUARD 3
[calmly] We do not fall in love. We only care for Dippy above.

HARVEY
I suppose that’s all I can do now.

[HARVEY slowly starts the Dippy solute when suddenly OXY unfreezes in the corner. She sees the slow solute and runs over to HARVEY and smacks his arm down.]

OXY
No don’t do it!

HARVEY
It’s the only thing I can do now though Oxy. The revolution is over. We lost.

!

46!

OXY
It’s not over until the fat lady sings, and this facility is too strict to have any fat ladies in it.

HARVEY
What does that even mean?

OXY
Don’t worry about it. All I’m saying is that all you need to do is rally up your friends again and remind them why they should fight. I mean, the guards are frozen in time right now. Now’s your chance to talk with your rebel friends again and encourage them to fight. Then you can run out before the guards unfreeze.

HARVEY
Hey, you’re right.

[HARVEY runs around and taps on the heads of the REBELS and they each unfreeze as he touches them.]

Hey everyone, I have something to tell you. I know that we have been beaten down and it feels like we will never have the strength to stand up against them again, but that’s not true. With just a little more heart, we can still win. We can go back, save Peter, and overthrow the government!

GAIL
Well I’m still not fighting until you tell me whether or not you love me.

KATHERINE Me either.

HARVEY
I thought that love would help us grow, but the books obviously lied on that front. There is no time for love during a revolution and frankly I haven’t known either of you long enough to say whether or not I love you anyway. Let’s figure this out after we win, but for now we need to continue to fight.

TOBY
You know what, you’re right! Group fighting isn’t one of my four fears, so I’m gonna take advantage of it. So are you two in or what?

GAIL
I guess you’re right. Katherine?

!

47!

KATHERINE
[stubbornly hesitant but then sighs] Okay then, I’ll fight, but mark my words you will fall in love with me after this!

HARVEY
Whatever you say. Let’s just get going!

[all the REBELS run toward the door but OXY stays behind.] Come on Oxy!

OXY
No it’s okay guys, you’ll need someone here to distract the guards after they unfreeze. I’m not much of a fighter anyway, so I’ll serve you better back here.

HARVEY Suit yourself.

[HARVEY motions the other REBELS to go first then he follows. As soon as he leaves the GUARDS unfreeze and look around confused.]

GUARD 2
Hey where did they go!?

GUARD 3
You! [walking over to OXY] Where did your little friends go!?

[OXY flashes the GUARDS a big smile then quickly puts on a serious face. She punches GUARD 3 in the face then elbows him in the back of the neck. GUARD 3 falls to the floor as OXY walks over to GUARD 2. He looks like he wants to fight, but he’s terrified. OXY knocks GUARD 2 out in a similar way. She kicks them both for good measure then looks around.]

OXY
[harsh voice] Finally, I can actually get some stuff done around here.

[OXY walks out the front door as the curtains close.]

!

48!

SCENE 2
Scene: Back in the meeting room. The table and chairs are all strewn

all to the sides. SONYA is holding the vase of flowers. The STUDENTS are all there and are continues to push stuff off to the side lead by VARNS. The GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS are all in the middle of the floor tied up. Peter is camouflaged with the files in the back of the room.

Opening: The STUDENTS are all pushing stuff around, making a mess. SNOIN looks very distressed. VARNS looks very confident walking around the room. JEANINE is yelling at them to let her go.

JEANINE
What the heck are you doing!? I demand you let me go!

VARNS
I’m afraid I can’t do that unless you can recite the entire Dippy Lawbook to me right now.

JEANINE
Who actually memorizes the entire Dippy Lawbook!?

VARNS
Command 1: Dippy is the commander of us all. Never question any of his commands. Command 2: if you disobey the first command, your name will be put in a drawing for a random death selection once a month. Command 3—

[BRENDA breaks a chair.]

SNOIN
No please stop! I beg you!

[SONYA walks in front of SNOIN and spills the flowers in front of her.]

SNOIN
No not my own daughter! How could you!? I can’t take this anymore. JeaniNe make them stop!

JEANINE
Don’t you think I would if I could? What are you doing here and why did you tie us up? We have a facility to run!

!

49!

VARNS
Well you couldn’t possibly be running it like you should be if you don’t know the Dippy Lawbook by heart!

ROXIE
We carry them with us—

VARNS
That’s not good enough! Obviously I am more competent than all of you here, so to best carry out the will of Dippy you need me as a commander. Now is probably an ideal time for me to tell you about why I believe this is the right thing to do, with all of you tied up and all. It all began when I was a young boy—

[HARVEY, KATHERINE, GAIL, and TOBY run into the room screaming. KATHERINE is holding a bow]

GAIL
We’re back and this time I won’t sit in a corner. I’m gonna fight to win Harvey’s love!

KATHERINE
I’m gonna earn his love not you! [pulls arrow on GAIL]

HARVEY
Woah, woah, woah she’s on your side Katherine! What are you doing? Where did you even get that bow?

KATHERINE
[lowers bow] Okay, but you better watch out Gail. [quickly pulls arrow again toward GOV OFFICIALS] Okay, now you better listen to what I have to say… Oh, you’re already tied up. [looks at VARNS] Snarv!

HARVEY
Oh hey Snarv, I didn’t mean to interrupt your little revolution. Was this your plan all along? I’ll admit, It’s pretty good. [looking around at the STUDENTS] How did you get these guys to help you though? They refused to help us!

GAIL
Yeah what gives [walks up to THERESA] You said that you were happy the way you were before so we didn’t force you to join us, but obviously you weren’t happy.

!

50!

THERESA
Well, you see when you all first came into the room and tried to explain your reasons for us joining, it just sounded impossible and irrational. When he [gestures to VARNS] came in the second time to try and recruit us, he made me realize that there is something that I am missing in my life… Seconds on brownies

HARVEY Huh?

THOMAS
We’ve discovered that true contentment lies in a second brownie on brownie Sunday. Mr. Varns promised to give us this if we backed him in his revolution, so naturally we joined.

JEANINE
Mr. Varns how could you allow such indulgence!?

HARVEY
Wait, wait, wait. Mr. Varns!?

VARNS
[evil laugh and throws his glasses to the ground] I tricked you with my disguise, but it was really me all along!

THOMAS
That’s not even a disguise, he’s just wearing glasses. [to HARVEY] How could you not notice? He’s your teacher.

[HARVEY picks up the glasses from the ground]

HARVEY
Maybe it’s the way the frames shape his face. It looks a bit narrower…

[HARVEY passes the glasses around to other REBELS]

VARNS
That’s not the point! The point is that I betrayed your trust! Because of this I am now free to take over the entire facility and restore rule to the way Dippy originally planned it. Order will be restored in the name of Dippy!

[KATHERINE puts on the glasses.]

KATHERINE
Do I look much different?

!

51!

GAIL
Wow, actually you do. It’s amazing what glasses can do to your face.

VARNS
Are you even listening to me!?

TOBY
Don’t worry about them, I need you to keep going. Unfinished stories are one of my four fears.

HARVEY
[to TOBY] That’s not even a real fear!

GAIL
[handing the glasses to HARVEY] You should try on these glasses now.

[only TOBY is looking at VARNS. A few other people have vague interest, but mostly people are still obsessing over the glasses]

VARNS
Thank you! Finally being shown some respect. I will now tell you my life story so you understand why I must do this. It started when I was a young boy. I love Dippy more than life and have always been more than willing to do anything for him. By the time I was 10 I had already memorized the entire Dippy Lawbook and began memorizing it backwards. Then when I was 11…

[GAIL looks over to VARNS]

GAIL
Wait, wait, wait. Mr. Varns, you were monologuing just then, weren’t you?

[everyone stops obsessing over the glasses and look at VARNS]

VARNS
I—I would never break Command 2,683—

HARVEY
That sounded like monologuing to me. Just like I was when you knocked me out and arrested me.

[GUARD 1 and GUARD 4 enter and walk towards VARNS]

VARNS
No I just had to tell you my life story! It’s required as the villain!

!

52!

HARVEY
Well then you should have thought of that before you became the villain.

[GUARDS walk to VARNS and grab him. VARNS struggles, and gets free for a little bit and pulls out a gun.]

VARNS
Step away from me!

[GUARDS walk toward him again. They are walking at an angle that would mean that he is aiming at PETER. VARNS shoots, but misses the guards and hits PETER. PETER yells and falls to the floor.]

HARVEY [concerned] Peter!?

GAIL
[impressed] Woah Peter I didn’t even see you! I think that’s your best camouflage yet!

[HARVEY runs over to where PETER is on the floor and stands above him.]

HARVEY
[concerned] What were you even doing there?

JEANINE
[shrugs] He promised he wouldn’t run away if we let him do that.

SNOIN
We were going to shoot him as soon as he was done, but he did such a good job we decided to keep it for a while. Even I was impressed.

PETER
[angry] Hey, I’m dying over here! Let’s focus on me before I finally die [cough then in a weaker voice] Harvey, come here, I need to tell you something

HARVEY
[bends down next to PETER] It’s okay Peter, you’ll get you through this. We haven’t gotten this far to have a main character die now.

!

53!

PETER
I’m seriously dying here, stop trying to comfort me, I’ve got some stuff to tell you. So first, I kept a secret bread recipe under my bed, but just in case they burn it before I can get to it, I’m going to tell you how to make it. You’re going to need 3 cups of flour, 1 teaspoon of salt [slowly gets quieter and dies].

HARVEY
No, no, no, but you were my best friend… and a major character. How will I go on without you!

[all the REBELS walk over and surround him]

GAIL
[solemnly] He was a strong fighter and a good man.

[They stand for a few seconds in silence.]

KATHERINE
Well there’s no point in crying about it. Our pause in action for talking time is almost up, and we’ve still got a revolution to win! So let’s do this!

All the REBELS but HARVEY Yeah!!!

[all the REBELS but HARVEY start fighting with the STUDENTS. KATHERINE runs over to VARNS and knocks the gun out of his hand and shoves him into GUARD 1. She then kills VERONICA then runs off to fight a student.]

KATHERINE Take him away!

[GUARDS start to walk out with VARNS]

JEANINE
Wait, what are you doing!? Free us!

GUARD 1
Dippy has never given orders to free tied up government officials.

[GUARDS walk off with a struggling VARNS]

JEANINE
You get back here and free us! Hey! [continues to yell]

!

54!

VLADIMIR
Untied? Oh I untied myself a while ago. [pulls out his hands and shows them]

ROXIE
Then why wouldn’t you untie us!?

VLADIMIR
I just wanted to fit in. I thought we were supposed to be tied up.

JEANINE
Just stop messing around and untie us already!

VLADIMIR Ok…

[VLADIMIR unties all the GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS. Meanwhile the REBELS and STUDENTS are fighting. Several STUDENTS die. HARVEY gets a gun and is randomly shooting, killing nobody. JEANINE then wrestles away a gun from a STUDENT and points it straight at HARVEY. The other OFFICIALS also take weapons.]

JEANINE
[yells] Stop right this instant!

HARVEY
I don’t have to! I’m a rebel! [HARVEY shoots at JEANINE but misses. He then realizes his gun is out of bullets. He throws his gun down and puts his hands up]

HARVEY
[nervously] Hey guys we should probably stop fighting now.

KATHERINE
[without looking at HARVEY] No way I’m just getting started! Die you stiffs!

[JEANINE takes a few steps closer]

HARVEY
[more forcefully] I really think we should stop!

KATHERINE
What do you—[turns her head and sees HARVEY.] No Harvey!

!

55!

[KATHERINE starts to run over to HARVEY but ROXIE stops her by pointing a gun at her. KATHERINE points her bow back at her. GAIL then looks over.]

GAIL Harvey!

[GAIL starts to run over to HARVEY but SNOIN stops her with a weapon. GAIL points her own gun back at SNOIN. JEANINE looks over when GAIL calls out and HARVEY takes this time to grab a gun and point it at JEANINE. She looks shocked when she looks back but just readjusts her gun. The STUDENTS aren’t sure what to do. The ones with weapons hesitate then start pointing their guns at random people. The ones without guns point finger guns to random people. VLADIMIR just looks really confused.]

JEANINE
Hm, looks like we are at a bit of a stalemate.

HARVEY
I suppose we are—

[JEANINE shoots her gun but it’s out of bullets]

HARVEY
Hey, you’re not supposed to shoot me until we have a deep conversation about our true motives.

JEANINE
This is the real world kid! People will never hear you out and your opinion will never matter!

HARVEY
That’s not true! [shoots gun at JEANINE but misses] What how did I miss!?

JEANINE
And you will never be able to shoot a gun without training! [walks menacingly toward HARVEY but suddenly the intercom comes on. OXY walks to the front of the stage and says these lines. No one can see her but the audience. While she is talking all the characters look around in the air.]

OXY
Hello everyone. I understand that you are in the middle of a fight right now. I don’t mean to interrupt, but I do have a few things to tell you. If you wouldn’t mind, I command you to come to the library.

!

56!

GAIL
[looking to the air] Is that Oxy?

HARVEY
I thought she was in the room with the guards.

JEANINE
Hey, no one should have access to the intercom except us. [to OFFICIALS] Did any of you give access to this “Oxy”.

SNOIN
I would never do something as crazy as that.

JEANINE
[looking to the air.] Hey how did you get access to the system!? I won’t allow for something like this!

OXY
Since I know that you are probably screaming around the room for answers, do note that I cannot hear you from here. Come to the library if you wish to speak to me.

TOBY
Come on guys, we need to go meet Oxy. It sounds like this will get interesting!

[VARNS runs out the door. The remaining students follow with the GOVERNMENT officials. REBELS start to follow.]

HARVEY
Wait what about Peter?

GAIL
There’s nothing we can do about it now. Wasn’t it you that wanted to do this revolution, regardless of our loses.

[GAIL, TOBY, and KATHERINE run out]

HARVEY
I still didn’t want anyone to die…

[HARVEY walks out after them sadly]

!

57!

SCENE 3
Scene: In the library with shelves full of books and books on the floor.

OXY is in there with all the people that have died before scene 2 wearing hats and glasses. They are all gathering the books to the middle of the floor.

Opening: GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS, KATHERINE, GAIL, TOBY, and live students run into the room. HARVEY follows, looking defeated. OXY is in the center of the room standing with the people that have all died and talking to them. All their faces are very blank. VARNS and those following him all look confused. SNOIN looks stressed out by the mess.

GAIL
Oxy, what on earth are you doing in here? This wasn’t apart of our plan.

OXY
No, it wasn’t. I have been planning this day far longer than you planned this silly revolution. Did you all really think that you could overthrow the government in a day? As if their guards couldn’t stop you. As if you wouldn’t be affected the same way by power. Did you really think you were any different than the current jokers in our government.

JEANINE
I resent that!

SNOIN
Jeanine look at this mess! [tries to tidy up the books]

ROXIE
Do you wanna fight!?

OXY
[coldly] Oh how silly.

[ROXIE rushes OXY but OXY kills her easily.] How easy it is to kill humans…

HARVEY
Oxy, what are you doing? I thought you were so kind. I never saw anyone smile as much as you. You were so nice to stay behind and let us get out of the reform camp.

OXY
As if I would actually act like that.

!

58!

HARVEY
But you were so encouraging! You said that we could defeat them if we just had a little more heart! I wouldn’t have gone on without your encouragement!

OXY
Ha! Did you really think a ragtag group of teenagers could actually defeat a government as powerful as this one? They had trained soldiers, more weapons access, better knowledge of the area. You couldn’t have won even if you tried.

HARVEY
But the people in the books did it…

JEANINE
She’s just stating the obvious you little runt. What I need to know is how you got access to the intercom system? Also the camera system. There’s no other way that you could know we were in the meeting room.

OXY
Why stop with asking about the intercom and camera? [starts walking around the OFFCIALS] When was the last time you checked the garbage system?

SNOIN
That’s Vlad’s job.

VLADIMIR
[squeaks] No, not me.

SNOIN What…

OXY
Have you even stepped foot in the kitchen?

SNOIN
That’s Jeanine’s job…

JEANINE
As if I would ever do such a dirty job. That’s Vlad’s job.

VLADIMIR No one ever…

!

59!

OXY
What about the alarms? Recycling program? Job assignment? Elderly facility? The education system? Body disposal? Shall I continue?

SNOIN
We should have someone on all of those…

OXY
Just one more. Who cleans the meeting room whenever you guys have your little discussions? [pause] You guessed it. Me. Every order you gave was taken care of by me, as they have been for a long time.

JEANINE
But wait, from how you’re talking it sounds like you’ve been the only one doing this. I’m much older than you. Our government has hundreds of years of history, something you can’t unravel even in your lifetime.

OXY
I’ve been around a little longer than you think.

JEANINE
Oh yeah? How long have you had access to all those systems?

OXY
Let’s see. It’s probably been about… 647 years?

[everyone is shocked]

JEANINE
But that’s the year Dippy died!

OXY
That’s right, I’ve been running this show since Dippy died. I took over directly for him. He asked me to watch in the background, just in case his government stopped working the way he designed.

JEANINE
But that’s impossible!

OXY
Maybe for you puny little humans, but I’ve still got hundreds of good years ahead of me.

SNOIN
What are you then?

!

60!

OXY
I’m Dippy’s devoted servant, but I guess you would call me a robot.

[everyone gasps]

JEANINE
But Dippy made a law against building robots.

OXY
For you guys to build robots, but he could do whatever he wants. And since I’m his robot, I can make my own robots…

[PETER walks into the room stiffly and straight faced]

HARVEY
Peter! [runs over and hugs PETER. PETER stops stiffly but doesn’t do anything to acknowledge him.] Hey Peter, I thought you were dead! I should have had more faith in you as a major character. [realizes PETER is not reacting] Hey Peter, can you hear me? Peter?

[suddenly PETER pushes HARVEY harshly out of his way. HARVEY falls to the floor and KTHERINE and GAIL run up to him.]

KATHERINE Harvey!

GAIL
Are you okay?

HARVEY
[ignores them] Hey Peter, what are you doing!?

[PETER walks over to OXY and stands next to her. Next VERONICA walks in followed by the STUDENTS who died.]

OXY
Haha, I didn’t know you killed so many of them. I’m glad that you did though.

[people who were stacking the books pull off their disguises and reveal themselves.]

HARVEY
But, but they’re all dead!

!

61!

OXY
Sure their brains are, but their bodies work great.

[VLADIMIR shoots PETER in the head out of fear. PETER falls to the floor]

HARVEY
Hey, he’s still my friend, you can’t shoot him. I could have still saved him.

OXY
Hahaha, your friend.

[PETER slowly starts to get up again]
Do you really think he’s your friend anymore? [HARVEY runs up to PETER]

HARVEY
Peter! Hey! It’s me Harvey! You gotta wake up! [to KATHERINE and GAIL] Guys come help me snap him out of this! He knows you better!

OXY
Don’t you understand! He’s dead! He’s only being kept alive by the computer chip in his brain. Once I remove that he’s gone, not even his body will move.

HARVEY
But I’ve seen this in the books, he will snap out of it!

OXY
No he won’t! Ah, the stupid things put in those books. Don’t you understand none of them can come true?

HARVEY
How would you know. There’s gotta be a reason they were written.

OXY
They were written because of me!

[HARVEY stops shaking PETER and looks at OXY]

HARVEY What?

!

62!

OXY
That’s right. I’ve been in charge of the facility since Dippy died, but I’ve been alive much longer than that. I wrote those alluring stories with the silly characters like Katniss, and Peeta, and your silly little Tris so I could then use those stories to manipulate how people think. Just like I’m doing right now. I didn’t write some of the very old books, but they did serve as an inspiration to me. Plus they made me realize how much books like that influence people, so I wrote my own, just with less realistic stories.

HARVEY
Why would you do that?

OXY
Obviously to trick you! I knew that the government would eventually become corrupt and stop following Dippy’s rules. I also knew that the most effective way to deal with this was to start a group of rebels whose every move I could expect because they followed the plans of my own novel. It’s so nice to see that after hundreds of years, my plan has worked flawlessly. You’ve destroyed each other perfectly. Now all I have to do is take a page out of one of those old novels, and burn this library to the ground.

HARVEY
No! Not Katniss or Peeta!

OXY
Obviously, you know too much. I can only have my personally controlled revolutions. I don’t want you starting a real one, so you will have to go as well.

[KATHERINE and GAIL jump in front]

KATHERINE
You’re not going to touch him!

GAIL
He was meant to lead the real revolution!

OXY
Oh too bad. [OXY kills KATHERINE and GAIL. They fall to the ground.]

HARVEY Katherine! Gail!

[OXY aims at TOBY.]

!

63!

TOBY
Stop! Dying without having done anything important is my biggest fear!

[OXY shoots TOBY]

HARVEY
Toby no! [messes with the gun in his hand but OXY knocks it out. HARVEY looks up helplessly at OXY.] But what about my revolution!? I was supposed to save everyone and stop this oppressive government.

OXY
Welcome to the real world Harvey. You’re a few hundred years too late.

[OXY shoots HARVEY and he falls to the floor. The curtain closes]

!

64!

SCENE 4
Scene: Back to the classroom. VARNS is standing at the front while a

number of students are sitting in chairs.

Opening: VARNS is talking in a very robotic voice (he is a robot now). The students are all sitting blankly ahead with their hands neatly on their desks.

VARNS
And that was the story of how Harvey tried to take over the facility and obviously failed because Dippy is far more powerful than anyone else can ever be. Hail Dippy.

CLASS Hail Dippy.

VARNS
Very good. Now, it is Sunday, so Oxy is going to come around with your double brownies.

[OXY walks into the room with a tray of brownies. All the students look at her with blank faces but watch her eagerly with the tray of brownies.]

Welcome to our classroom Oxy.

OXY
Hello Varns. You sound as robotic as ever. I never could get the imitation of the human voice down as well in my robots as Dippy did for me. I suppose that’s why he’s the great and powerful Dippy though and I am simply his humble robot servant. Anyway, [to VARNS] What have you been learning here today?

VARNS
We learned all about Harvey and his helpers that failed miserably to try and take over the facility.

OXY
Oh that tall tale. A very good story to show students how foolish a revolution is. Why would anyone ever want that anyway when they could have double brownie Sunday? So now we begin.

[walks up to first student.]
Now what do we say when we want a brownie?

!

65!

[all students at the same time as OXY passes the brownies around the room.]

STUDENTS
We love assimilation because it unifies the nation.
Don’t make a friend or it will spell your end.
We do not fall in love. We only care for Dippy above
Without social order the Unity will fall and chaos will rule all Dippy saved us. He will not betray us.

!

66!

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