28 Aug

Old Lady on the Corner

Original Draft:

The house on the corner was truly your home.

Sweet and Old you would often have a smile

But you would seldom leave your walls to roam

And you would often fancy I stay a while.

 

You would give me toys to place on my shelf

An old rocking horse your dad made from wood

A necklace or ring to adorn myself

Also cookies like an old woman should

 

One day you packed up and you moved away

You can’t live on your own while wearing thin

“Thank you for coming to see me today”

But of course we would, for you are like kin.

 

To my sweet old neighbor who gave me toys

I thank you for your gifts and humble joy.

I made some changes to this sonnet because reading over it, it just sounds very awkward and disjointed. There was no nice flow like a sonnet should have. Also, the words that I used were bland at times and not very descriptive. Sometimes I had a hard time imagining what it was supposed to look like and I was the one that wrote it! The first time around, I did not put enough thought into this poem, but going back to edit it, I tried to make it come to life more and carry more feeling about the little old lady who lived on the corner.

The house on the corner. That was your home.

Sweet and old, with an ever-present smile.

Your weakened body would not let you roam,

So I would come to you and stay a while.

 

You gave me trinkets to place on my shelf,

An old rocking chair hand crafted from wood,

A bracelet or ring to adorn myself,

And cookies with lemonade when you could.

 

One day a van came to move you away.

In the corner house you felt a bother.

“Thank you for visiting me” you would say.

But of course. You are like my grandmother.

 

When I was young I thought you gave me toys,

But I know now, what you gave me was joy.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>